Tell me when it's over

am tired, i really am- mentally, emotionally and physically.
but i have to keep moving and moving around, just to move on.

i was the one who used to be happy, nothing else matters but having fun.
as am growing older, i become the person whom i never knew.
sometimes i can get too moody, my mood jumps around everywhere for no particular reason.
to answer the question why, i am not satisfied with my life and how my life turns out to be.
am disappointed with what the world offers me to take in.
am worth more than the pain. i have waited for so long for a miracle. what more it takes to put mercy on me? am fucking tired and fed up!!!!!!!

i rasa kosong! hidup i rasa kosong. i have nothing yang i boleh turn up to.
sometimes i rasa am losing my own self. i dont even know who i really am anymore.
and sometimes i also rasa am moving too fast, sehinggakan i tak tahu apa yg telah i tinggalkan dan apa yg telah tinggalkan i. i need a big slap that brings me back to reality. yes, a big hard slap!

i wish i could turn back time (i know this sounds sick and fucking cliche)
but it all started meeting up with the east. my life becomes complicated.
i wish i could have my normal life back where there will be only me and my girlfriends.
a simple life that makes me tenang. am done drama.
am taking back my steps, am moving forward- skipping the drama.
i dont want to get involved with any of this.
i nak ketenangan and my quality time with my girlfriends, just them, alone.

p.s. god, please make it easy for me. make me slow down. am fragile.