Leaving in peace

Am trapped with own confusion - to go away or to be gone away.

Insecurity eats me up, shrink the feelings I have and had.

Afraid of own choice, might leave in emptiness.

From the days i started to leave you to days i wanted you to be around, am hopelessly tired.

......

Life has its ups and downs - make the most of it

What is done, done

If leaving is the choice - leaving in peace I choose

.

p.s. nothing feels as high as SKL

She needs white space

she says:
i think its easier to tell someone who knows u but doesnt know u like ur best friends know u

he says:
yeah...i totally agree. ur bestfriend wud understand u well

she says:
yeah best friends understand us well but when the problem is about them, they will not understand and i cant tell them

he says:
yeah i knoe what u mean....sometimes they ambil hati when its bout them. kadang kala its best to tolerate la when ur best friend upsets u

.....

he says:
maybe u need some time alone

yes indeed i need space.

Always bickering!

It was 4 am in the morning when my friends were complaining about their boyfriends. Khye just finished talking to Aliff but was pissed off and Sheila was arguing with Stanley. This is normal, seeing them fighting every night on the phone.

They once asked, is this still love after years they have been together?

Entahlah, macam mana I nak jawab when I, myself tidak pernah ada serious relationship. If it is worth the fight then stick to your boyfriend. A relationship needs compromising. It is ok if you give in more than your boyfriend, he’ll catch up.

You know friends, nak cari someone sahaja sudah takes time and it takes years to get to know someone lagi. Berapa tahun lagi you mahu untuk settle down when u have reached 20s? So, think before you leave your boyfriend, mungkinkah chances to get to know someone itu ada lagi? And even if you nak cari someone, you have to cari someone yang jauh lebih baik daripada the old one, don’t go for the lebih kurang one. No point of looking for a new one then – until or unless your boyfriend is a total jerk, memang patutlah you tinggalkan dia.

p.s What happens when the love just stops?

Mr. Afiq, I am lost!

Ehem.. Am in class and again, secretly using the Internet when Mr. Afiq is merepek-ing about whatever shit permainan tradisional. We are supposed to take bloody pictures about any permainan but only one permainan tradisional for our photo gallery next week. Esok jom menembak geng!

Kesian kan? Sheila, Caon and I terpaksa keluar from our kelas, D and masuk ke kelas C. Funny thing is, this class is always berperang mulut. Fun! haha. Anyways, this class is better than A, Journalism class. What the...

p.s. Sheila is sibuk-ing checking her bf's facebook :P

In class at the moment

Am in my Photo Comm class and secretly using the Internet while the whole class is watching a documentary film about poverty and war thingy.

I have forgotten that I once wished that I would do photojournalism when am older until today. I know the course that I am taking now which is Mass Communication completes me. I see communication differently from the others and how people spread stories really excite me. I am no afraid to voice out my thoughts and I value life highly. The world is so much than just a gigantic circle. Anyways, pray that somehow, one day, I would be able to put myself in Photojournalism and travel the world to do more documetary films and journals.

.

p.s. Tomorrow is Valentine's Day. Wink. Wink. Anyone? Be my date? haha

Fed-up

Am i taking things seriously than I am supposed to take or things in my life are meant to be taken seriously?

"You jadi macam ni sebab you macam ni. Ego you.."

I ni bukan berani sangat nak take chances. I am afraid to get hurt until it actually hurts myself. Entahla... Life is simple but complicated. Right.. then apa yang simple-nya until it complicates everything or.. am I just making it complicated? Confusion, I've been jailed in confusion for so long.

The hardest week

Am having a bad week this week - too much to take at a time

Sungguh lama rasanya untuk minggu ni berakhir
Banyak juga yang berlaku dan berakhir dalam minggu yang panjang ini
Bertukar-tukar emosi sehingga tidak tertahan lagi untuk menahan
Masih juga tiada yang memahami
Sehingga kini masih juga keliru
Namun, masih juga kuat dalam ketakutan dan kelemahan ini